Making decisions is always divisive

“Making decisions is always divisive,” Tony Blair.

On the death of Dame Margaret Thatcher, former Prime Minister of England, Tony Blair, was asked what he thought about her and one of his answers was, “Making decisions is always divisive.” I had never thought about the process of making decisions in this way before.

So I have mulled it over and over for the last week or so. And now I am ready to explore it. To tackle it and what it means to me.  I realize now just how profound his depiction of decision making really is. It helped me to understand why it is so hard for us to make decisions. And stick with them. Particularly if we are people pleasers or people that do not want to hurt anyone.  Because deep down we know when we do, we will not be completely settled with the decision we have made and nor will those around us especially if the decisions is controversial or will hurt others. But it is a true fact that most decisions will impact some in a positive way while they will impact others in a negative way.

When Dame Margaret Thatcher, whether we like her or not, took power in England, she was the only woman to do so and because she made decisions over and over again regardless of what those decisions did for her politically, she became known as the “Iron Lady”. And even on her death, those who felt wronged by her could not and would not forgive her despite her ultimate downward spiral from a woman of such great stature to a woman who had lost touch with reality. Beginning with having lost her seat of power by being betrayed by her supposedly close allies, the death of her beloved husband and finally suffering from dementia.

Still she was not forgotten nor forgiven. All because she made decisions which in her opinion had to be done to bring her country back from the brink of destruction and financial ruin.

Sure some of the decisions she made were quite punitive and caused a lot of pain for a lot of people and quite possibly for herself behind closed doors. Something we will never know about her because she probably died with those secrets close to her heart. But what I believe about her is that she had the nerves of steel to make decisions in the first place particularly because she was a woman, the first and incidentally the last woman Prime Minister of England. And because she made those decisions she created much divisiveness in England. People to this day still either hate her or love her and there seems to be little in between.

What I admire about Dame Thatcher is that she did not waver in the face of public outcry. Did not waver when the politicians were coming at her with their long knives. Did not falter when pressure was put on her to be something she could not be. She made change after change to her country by making decisions and sticking with them.

The sign of true leadership is having the ability to make those decisions that are best for the greater good regardless of the personal consequences it may have on us as individuals. Because sometimes it means having to be hated and vilified. Honest decisions based on trying to help rather than hide behind political waffling are hard to make. Having the ability to stare down the opposition and stand by our convictions as Dame Thatcher did is a mark of honour.

I know I have made some major decisions in my life that still haunt me to this day but they are decisions I know have led me to where I need to be. Sometimes away from people and situations I never thought I would leave. Sometimes forgiving people and situations I never thought I would.  And sometimes by forgiving, changing the dynamics of the way I interact with people and situations from the decision point on.

When we make decisions, there are some who will feel slighted while there are others who will feel vindicated by them. Always. That’s why they are called decisions. Not politicking. Not pulling the wool over people’s eyes. Not placating people with what they want to hear.

I believe it is better to have made a decision, taken a stand, then to be known as someone who changed liked the wind and no one knew or understood who we were or what we represented. Dame Margaret Thatcher may have died as one of the controversial people of our time but no one could ever say they did not know where she stood or what she represented. A classic example of Tony Blair’s statement , “making decisions is always divisive” is none other than Dame Margaret Thatcher. Decision maker extraordinaire. May she now rest in peace.