@Sheryl Sandberg, the lightning rod for change

Sheryl Sandberg, the lightning rod for women’s issues. Every once in a while someone emerges as the lightning rod - the one to take the strike in order for the rest of us to sit up and pay attention. To become aware. To dialogue. Whether she wanted to or not, Sheryl Sandberg has emerged as that person, that woman, the one to take the lightning strike to open the dialogue about women, between women, and for women. To open the dialogue about where we fit in the Corporate white male Boy’s Club, where we sit on Boards, whether we want to or not. Or whatever way we want to lean – whether in or out.

I have to admit the first time I had ever heard of Sheryl Sandberg was when she interviewed Oprah on Facebook. I watched the interview because it was about Oprah. Not expecting to be equally enamored by this woman Sheryl Sandberg. But I was just as mesmerized with her as I was with Oprah. Not easily done let me tell you. Oprah is way up there in my estimation.

Yet Sandberg’s  presence was just as dynamic as Oprah’s. Her poise refreshing. Her sense of awe of Oprah surprising. But most of all I was struck by how articulate, direct, playful and complex her personality was. A woman of presence. In command of who she is and what she wants.

And then I lost sight of her. Every once in a while she emerged again but not in as high a profile as she has reemerged this time with her controversial book called Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead. I once again have to admit when I first heard about her book and her stance; I was irritated that she had become the lightning rod for women’s issues. Irritated that she was quoted as saying it was easy for women to lean in rather than out. Hearing her comments from third party sources without hearing them from her directly had caused me to condemn this woman. Jumping on the bandwagon of how disappointed I was in a woman like Sandberg who has the ability to really light up the world with the power of women making such sweeping and damning statements about women. Leaving room for interpretation, misrepresentation and hysteria on my behalf and lots of other women as has been the case with Sandberg.

And then I watched her being interviewed on 60 Minutes and my whole opinion and outlook on her changed. Once again I saw the woman I saw who interviewed Oprah. I saw the woman who is just like me deep down inside. A woman who embodies the spirit of every woman.  The same vulnerabilities, insecurities and guilt. She may have reached dizzying heights in her career at the young age of 43 but she still grapples, as do many of us women, with feelings of guilt of trying to find the balance between motherhood and career, career and wife, career and work life balance. If such Nirvana actually does exist.

I saw in Sandberg’s eyes the desire to be accepted, respected, liked, and validated as do we all. And most of all I saw and heard a women not advocating that every woman has to ‘lean in’, I saw quite the contraire. I saw a woman who wants to empower those women who do want to ‘lean in’ with the tools to be able to do so.

Unlike the articles that have been printed about her, the stories that have been hitting the airwaves, the cover of Time magazine depicting Sandberg as creating a cat fight with women, Sheryl is not trying to do any of that. She is not trying to pit women against each other. Nor is she trying to make women feel bad for the choices we have made. I discovered she is using her influence, her high profile position, to draw attention to the plight of women who want to ‘lean in’ but can’t and wonder why not.

She is drawing attention to the fact that women should not be afraid to negotiate higher salaries, contribute in  meetings, accept and embrace our worthiness and be proud of who we are where we are for what we are. That we should not shrink into the background and not be seen if we want to make it into boardrooms and C-Suites. That our contributions are just as worthy as those of our male counterparts. And we should speak and act with authority without apology and without guilt if our choice is to 'lean in'.

So Sheryl I thank you for being the lightning rod to open the dialogue again. To take the strike for all the women who choose to ‘lean in’. And for all the women who choose not to for whatever reason, let’s still rally together to help to raise up and offer the women who do. To assist them with the tools and support they need to penetrate the invisible glass ceiling that has come back with a vengeance so they too can help pave the way for the changing workforce. So they can be invaluable contributors to the global and diversifying workforce.

 I applaud you Sheryl for being the lightning rod, the catalyst for change, for taking the strike necessary to change the makeup of the Boardrooms and C-suite globally. For bringing the plight of women into the minds of those who take our contributions for granted.

I am rallying behind you, for you and beside you because you are every woman just as I am as she is as are we all. ‘Leaning in’ with support and grace. Strength in numbers. United we stand. Divided we fall. Namaste.