Yesterday was Global Giving Day at my company where we go out into the community and give back. And despite being exceedingly busy at work, I decided I would go out into the community and do my part particularly when I discovered that one of the choices was to go to a school and spend time with children. I have always wanted to teach so I jumped at the opportunity to be in the presence of children. And the experience went beyond my expectations. I loved every minute of it.
It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining. The air felt fresh and I felt so privileged to have been given the honor of spending time with children. Children who don’t always get a lot of visitors to their schools. Who don’t often get exposed to all the opportunities my children and other children do. And it was such an inspiring day to be with these children.
And what I learnt from them yesterday was no matter where we come from. No matter what we look like, no matter our story, at the end of the day all we want is someone to look us in the eyes and treat us like we matter. Validate our existence. Let us know what we think, feel and say is important.
Some of the children came into my circle with huge attitudes like what are you crazy people here to do. Like they were anticipating being bored by us adults who had no clue who they were or what their stories were. When I found out which group I was going to get I stood to the side of them for a while and listened to them. To hear the sorts of comments they were making. To watch their body language. To try to gage how best to win them over. To break through the armour some of them were wearing to protect themselves from being hurt.
And before I got them in the circle I went over and talked to them about the parade their school had put on just before we got there. Two of the boys immediately told me they had been in the parade. Dancing the gombeys. One was proud that he had been in it. The other angry because he thought the parade was boring. And when I probed further I discovered it was because he did not have the time or space to shine. To do his own individual dance because the parade was so tight. Discovering he was not being disrespectful. Instead he was just disappointed that he did not get the spotlight he so craved.
Once I got them in the circle, I had their numbers so instead of being overbearing I led them by letting them believe they were in charge. But letting them choose how to answer. How to remember my colleagues and because I knew they needed to feel important. And also I gave them the option of participating or observing because some of them were so tough due to their own circumstances that they did not want to show anyone of us including their peers their weaknesses. Life to them already meant suiting themselves up in armour every single day and there was no way they could show they cared or were weak.
I could feel it from their energy. I could tell the ones who had love and understanding in their homes. And I could tell the ones who were on their own fighting for their own survival. And I tried to honour the place each one of those children were. Remembering they were my daughter’s age. Remembering it was only a few years later that I became like some of the ones hiding their stories, fighting for survival, trying to be heard. And I wanted them to see and understand nothing is impossible if they believe. Nothing is out of their reach if they have faith.
Such that by the time we did the dream big exercise even the toughest of the tough of the children was excited and ready to express his or her desires through writing, drawing or however else he or she wanted. And when they were done, several of them were so proud of what they had done, that they wanted me to read it our loud to them. To see the light in their eyes when they I read their dreams back to them was like winning the lottery. Pure and unobstructed joy.
I walked away from that experience feeling so fulfilled, so inspired, so grateful. Hoping that from that small interaction I helped to open the eyes and heart of at least one child to the world around them. Children are precious and fragile. They are what we adults do not what we say. They observe and take in our energy and become that because they are like sponges trying to find their own rhythm. Their own place in this big wide world.
My experience yesterday was one of the most rewarding experiences I have had in a long time. And it made me realize just how important it is to be there for our children. Not just in criticizing and chastising them but in building them up as well. Spending time with them. Validating them because as Wayne Dyer says, “Your children will see what you are about by what you live rather than what you say.”
I picked my children up from school yesterday and really talked and listened to them. Laughed with them. And enjoyed them because I know I only have a short time in their lives to show them what I am about.
In gratitude to the beautiful children I spent time with yesterday for reminding me just how much our children really need us to be the example we want them to be; not by our words but by the way we live our lives. And for reminding me we are always learning. Always teaching.
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