Back to work today

Back to work today after two days off. It’s cold and dark outside. The wind is howling. Listening to the sounds of things banging, creaking and groaning under the strain of the wind. Knowing that’s why my son’s light is on and why my daughter came running into our bed this morning. Thinking of how I hugged her again and again before tearing myself out of bed.

Bundling myself up again in my robe. Trying desperately to hold onto the comfort of home. The warmth of my family togetherness. Before I have to leave them. Feelings of nostalgia and sadness washing over me in waves. Looking out the window surprised by the angry yet beautiful red sky. Knowing we are on the cusp of another winter storm. Wishing I could just keep the blinds closed and stay inside where it is safe. Where the rest of my family still sleeps.

Sitting, contemplating. Thinking about what’s to come. Sad because I have to leave my family during this holiday season particularly with an unwell husband. Telling myself to not be sad but to be grateful for the time we spent together. Look at the glass as half full rather than half empty.

Thinking about those who will never see their loved ones again because of tragedies leading up to Christmas and for some sadly on Christmas Day. Events that will always trigger feelings of remorse during the season when we are filled with the most joy. Thinking of how they will have such a difficult time putting the pieces back together because for them the Christmas season will be filled with so much pain for quite some time.

Thinking about the fact that hope has been stripped away from them until they come to terms with their losses. If ever, for some. Remembering that my leaving my family is only temporary so I have so much to be grateful for rather than concentrating on what I do not.

Just thinking about the plight of others who have lost loved ones over the holiday season has shifted my thoughts from sadness to gratitude.  Because I have tapped into my compassionate being. That being that is connected to everyone and everything. That being that feels the ripple effect of loss of one to us all. Interconnections existing all the time but forgotten until something tragic or grand takes place.

Sending out feelings of love, peace, light, faith and hope to all of us seeking today. All of us trying to come to terms with where our journey is taking us. Surrendering to the journey rather than focusing on the destination. Pulling myself out of the funk of having to get back to reality recognizing my reality is a product of my imagination. I create where I am, who I am and what I am at all times.

So today I choose to look at the glass as half full. Grateful for waking up this morning. Grateful for having all my family intact. Grateful for being grateful. Going out into the world today full of gratitude. Determined to accept I am where I am meant to be. And grateful for accepting and surrendering to the sense of my Divine Purpose. Fulfilling my true purpose in life. Knowing I am here for a reason. Going out today using my gifts to best serve the world and myself.