3.11.10 My life changed in an instant. In a flash. It was 3 years ago today that I discovered I was about to be made redundant for the first time in my life. The job and staff I had worked hard to help create for two years was about to be suddenly and abruptly pulled out from under me. Without warning. Without preparation. In a very public and humiliating way. Turning my world upside down. Causing me to pause. To stop. To try to figure out what it is that I want from life.
So I did. I stopped. I paused. I contemplated. Allowed myself to feel a myriad of emotions, feelings, and aspirations. And before I knew it I was writing, walking, existing and then my period of contemplation and introspection was over and I was back in my career at the place where I first began in Bermuda. Going backwards to go forwards.
And here I sit three years later still grappling with the whys and the what fors. Still grappling with what I was meant to learn from that experience that has brought me back to where I began. When I look around at the people in my space, I see there are many who I need to complete the circle of life with because they are back in my life. Back in my career as if we are riding the same wave together. As if we are meant to share this life experience together. Our relationships have shifted in some cases. Our roles reversed. Allowing each one of us to see the view from the other’s perspective. Allowing each of us to contemplate how the choices we make put us where we are.
I sit here three years later still feeling like I am on shaky ground. Wondering whether I am doing what I am meant to be doing. Wondering whether the choices I have made are mine or those of others. Whether I am still placating the needs of others before my own.
So I closed my eyes this morning when I realized the date. The date that has resonated with a place deep down inside me and this is what I heard from that place of stillness,
There is more to life
Life is screaming at me
You have so much more to give
Life is screaming at me
Why are you hiding behind the limitations imposed upon you by others
Life is screaming at me
It’s time to step out of life’s mediocrity and onto the path of unlimited possibility
Life is screaming at me
Onto the path where your talents shine and are meant to shine
Life is screaming at me
Away from the place where people try to make you feel less than who you are
Life is screaming at me
To the place where opportunities are everywhere
Life is screaming at me
To the place of unlimited choices
Life is screaming at me
To the place where people accept there is universal abundance
Life is screaming at me
Okay life I answer back
Stop screaming at me
Please
Okay I answer back
Okay I answer back
Again
And Again
I am open
Willing
And able to step on to the path of unlimited possibility
Open
Ready
Willing and able
Today is 3.11.13
Three years later
I commit to pure existence
Pure love
Pure acceptance
Of the abundance the Universe has to offer
Giving as much as I receive
Letting go of the scarcity mentality
Letting go of old belief systems
Embracing the concept that there is more than enough for all of us
Accepting
I am more than worthy of receiving
So I commit
To stepping out of my own way
To allow all that is meant to be
To be
For me
Unapologetically and unequivocally
Amen.
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