A painful lesson in forgiveness

Recently I received a huge blow from someone who had asked me to complete a project. A project I blindly took on thinking I was doing something for the general good. Only to realise  the reason I was asked to complete this project was for the sole purpose of promoting the person's ego. And when the person did not receive the accolades he thought he would, he lost interest totally in the project. Literally turned his back on me in the blink of an eye.
And I have to admit every time I think about the amount of work that went into the project for no real reward from the person, I get really angry. Hurt even. To know I was so naive to put myself out there. Only to have the person who asked to complete the project abandon me when it did not turn out the way he had anticipated. The whole experience has been a journey for me - a very humbling one to say the least.
What I am learning from this experience is to be careful with whom I entrust my time. To dig deep into people's motives so I can understand their expectations before agreeing to take on projects. To determine whether I am being asked to complete someone else's dream rather than my own. And if I am then the answer should be no because whenever we try to live out someone else's dream, it very rarely becomes our own. Often it becomes everyone's nightmare because dreams are meant to be dreamt and achieved only by the person who dreams it.
When I think about the time it took me to complete the project, I feel sick to my stomach about how I was treated. But then I tell myself there was a lot of blood, sweat and tears that went into the project. A lot of knowledge gained, I will never forget. Nor would I have accumulated had I not taken the project on.
So instead of feeling bad for what I accomplished without much support. Instead of feeling like I have been left hanging out to dry. I acknowledge the wealth of information and sense of accomplishment I managed to achieve. Allowing me to realise I must forgive the person for the way he handled me because as long as I hold onto the anger and resentment I will not be able to make space in my heart to forgive myself.  To recognise I can not control the way he treated me. Nor can I go back and change history. All I can do is detach myself from the outcome. Surrender myself to the pain I feel. Acknowledge it then let it go. Thanking the Universe for the opportunity to learn how not to treat people and how to treat myself at the same time.
And for this difficult lesson of forgiveness, detachment and surrender I am truly grateful.