The last couple of weeks I have been decluttering my life. Getting rid of things I don’t need. Making space for space. Rather than having to have every corner of my life overloaded.
I started with my closet. And just did a clean sweep. First with all the clothes I was holding onto that I have never worn or can’t wear anymore. Finally admitting to myself that I have outgrown them. That I bought them by mistake. That they had lost their appeal to me. Telling myself to forget about how much I paid for them. To forget about what they meant to me twenty years before when they were in style.
Yesterday I did the same with my shoes. Getting rids of the mistakes. The ugly ones. Or the one that hurt my feet. And when I stepped back from my closet, I actually felt like I could breathe because there was so much space. I feel so proud of the way my closet looks. Because I can actually find things in there again.
I have rediscovered clothes and shoes I forgot I had. And now what remains in my closet are only things I know I will wear. So inspiring because now it is easier for me to get dressed because I know what I have left are only items that are useful. And I treasure. With the added bonus that I can find them more readily. I also know what goes with what. So it is a pleasure getting dressed now rather than a chore.
My husband then said to me, “I hope you’re not getting rid of that stuff just to buy more stuff.” At first I was angry with him for taking me off my high. For not acknowledging what I had done and only focusing on the negative. But after thinking about what he said, I realized the reason why I was angry was because he had hit a nerve. Often times we get rid of stuff only to bring more stuff in. Never really giving ourselves time to appreciate what we have. Instead we are always looking for more. Craving for more; so much so that we don’t even give ourselves the opportunity to know what we have. Nor do we value what we have because we don’t stop to say enough is enough. More is always better.
Only with hindsight did I realize my husband was actually my angel for the day because he was reminding me to appreciate all the hard work I had done by cleaning out my closet and to savour the feeling of having space to see all that I have. He was telling me not to rush out and fill up every space I had cleared out once again cluttering my life with all I don’t need.
Swallowing my pride and ego, I realized he was right, often times we clutter too much to cover up for feelings of dissatisfaction from somewhere else. Hoarding and gathering are ways of telling ourselves we are in control and we can get whatever we want whenever we want. So there. But when it gets to the point of not being able to appreciate what we have, it’s time to discard what we don’t need in order to declutter our lives. And when we do, it’s amazing how liberating it can feel.
The act of decluttering goes beyond just our closets. It extends to every aspect of our lives. When we get rid of people who no longer make us feel good, things that no longer resonate with us, we make space for the new. Because we free our minds from the entanglement of too much. Allowing us space to breathe. Save time. And to figure out who we are and what we want. Rather than hiding behind all the clutter. It's amazing how free I feel now. And can breathe too. I am so glad I decluttered. So pleased.
And for this simple lesson of decluttering my closet, allowing me space to breathe, I am truly grateful.
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